I've recently been hired to be the Student Ministries Dir. I know full well that I'll be bringing my 'baggage' w/ me in a new context. What should I do/not do in my 1st few months? What are some mistakes that I can avoid? Best steps to take upon arrival?
Great question! I will do my best to answer it.
First step... create your filter for the baggage. You refer to baggage and we all have it. It's going to be hard for you to completely dismiss previous scars. Depending on the depth of your baggage though you may need to talk to someone outside of where you came from and where you are going. It can't be your spouse or family alone. Someone you trust and someone you know who is not going to tell you what you want to hear. They should also be someone who can be the go to each week for the first year of your tenure at your new church. That might sound overwhelming but you know how hard it is in ministry and pain usually comes in slow building layers that if left unchecked will demand to be unleashed and usually at the surprise of everyone around you. With the baggage outlet you hopefully will be able to give the new people in your life credit that the others took from you or that you took from yourself. It is not their fault nor have they been where you came from so those two points should speak loud and clearly to you as you buld relationships with them. When things surface from them that look a lot like where you came from and the pain you went through arises you will be able to have someone to bounce it off of until you feel more secure. Always consider yourself the source of your own fears in the way you receive people or new environments.
Second step...strip it down to the basics. Before you arrive you need to write down the top five things that matter the most with you in student ministry. It can be form, function, substance, or vision. When the list is finished you have to pick only three. These are the only three things you're going to try to accomplish, birth, or change in the first two years. Three is plenty. This is also the only three things you will talk about. Examples: relational ministry, big events, trainning. Now, don't act on them until you've spent your first six months worth of energy in step three.
Step three... listen to what they say and what they don't say. Bring your team together and let them know that you're only interested in knowing them as individuals in the beginning but that as a group there will be hanging out and coming together around what's already happening in student ministry. You want to meet with each person seperately at least 3 times within that first six months depending on how big the team is. If you can meet more great but have balance and give everyone equal distribution of your time and energy. What are you doing over a cup of coffee? Listening. Listen to what they say when they talk about their family, Christ, the church. ministry. Everyone is going to have a ton of ideas and some will be more excited than others to hear what you have to say but you don't know them and they really don't know you. When they answer a question you need to extract as much as you can out of them when it comes to passion and what they wish they could do. Pay paticular attention to people who talk about the three things you wrote on your list and to the people who didn't. You're not keeping score but instead identifying potential people to lead thru or cultivate more. Somewhere between 4-6 months you can start to make changes. Think also about the teams you want to have in the program and who is in the room that can lead them. You're going to find out these things as you talk to them.
*** Also, if people leave right before or right after you get there don't take it personal. A lot of times people use a change in leadership to go ahead and act on something they have already been thinking that they will do. Nobody if they come in listening and building community should deserve the blame if people bolt.
Here are some questions.
What made you want to get involved in youth ministry?
What do you do? - This is probably the single most identifying question. Listen to this answer because it will be answered with emotional attachment and sense of worth or value to the team.
What do you wish you could do?
Who are some students you connect with?
What kind of student do you not connect well with?
Get them also to talk aout their family?
This is a question you need to ask as well... Tell me how you first started your journey toward God?
What do you think is the most important thing we do as a youth group?
Use these phrases... tell me more, explain that. (Get in their head.)
Hey... if I didn't answer your question well let me know and tell me how I can help you more. Great question but I'm running out of blog.
First step... create your filter for the baggage. You refer to baggage and we all have it. It's going to be hard for you to completely dismiss previous scars. Depending on the depth of your baggage though you may need to talk to someone outside of where you came from and where you are going. It can't be your spouse or family alone. Someone you trust and someone you know who is not going to tell you what you want to hear. They should also be someone who can be the go to each week for the first year of your tenure at your new church. That might sound overwhelming but you know how hard it is in ministry and pain usually comes in slow building layers that if left unchecked will demand to be unleashed and usually at the surprise of everyone around you. With the baggage outlet you hopefully will be able to give the new people in your life credit that the others took from you or that you took from yourself. It is not their fault nor have they been where you came from so those two points should speak loud and clearly to you as you buld relationships with them. When things surface from them that look a lot like where you came from and the pain you went through arises you will be able to have someone to bounce it off of until you feel more secure. Always consider yourself the source of your own fears in the way you receive people or new environments.
Second step...strip it down to the basics. Before you arrive you need to write down the top five things that matter the most with you in student ministry. It can be form, function, substance, or vision. When the list is finished you have to pick only three. These are the only three things you're going to try to accomplish, birth, or change in the first two years. Three is plenty. This is also the only three things you will talk about. Examples: relational ministry, big events, trainning. Now, don't act on them until you've spent your first six months worth of energy in step three.
Step three... listen to what they say and what they don't say. Bring your team together and let them know that you're only interested in knowing them as individuals in the beginning but that as a group there will be hanging out and coming together around what's already happening in student ministry. You want to meet with each person seperately at least 3 times within that first six months depending on how big the team is. If you can meet more great but have balance and give everyone equal distribution of your time and energy. What are you doing over a cup of coffee? Listening. Listen to what they say when they talk about their family, Christ, the church. ministry. Everyone is going to have a ton of ideas and some will be more excited than others to hear what you have to say but you don't know them and they really don't know you. When they answer a question you need to extract as much as you can out of them when it comes to passion and what they wish they could do. Pay paticular attention to people who talk about the three things you wrote on your list and to the people who didn't. You're not keeping score but instead identifying potential people to lead thru or cultivate more. Somewhere between 4-6 months you can start to make changes. Think also about the teams you want to have in the program and who is in the room that can lead them. You're going to find out these things as you talk to them.
*** Also, if people leave right before or right after you get there don't take it personal. A lot of times people use a change in leadership to go ahead and act on something they have already been thinking that they will do. Nobody if they come in listening and building community should deserve the blame if people bolt.
Here are some questions.
What made you want to get involved in youth ministry?
What do you do? - This is probably the single most identifying question. Listen to this answer because it will be answered with emotional attachment and sense of worth or value to the team.
What do you wish you could do?
Who are some students you connect with?
What kind of student do you not connect well with?
Get them also to talk aout their family?
This is a question you need to ask as well... Tell me how you first started your journey toward God?
What do you think is the most important thing we do as a youth group?
Use these phrases... tell me more, explain that. (Get in their head.)
Hey... if I didn't answer your question well let me know and tell me how I can help you more. Great question but I'm running out of blog.
0 comments:
Post a Comment