the trouble with the $ex talk

The rhetoric in church to help non-believers absorb what they are about to hear from the pastor about God's view of sex is unfortunately based on the wrong assumption. The assumption is that all the world thinks that "Christians" shun sex and lace it with guilt, shame, and threats of God being upset about it as if it were evil. Leaders hope that if they can diffuse that negativity and then help people understand God is for sex then it will allow them to express God's boundaries. They hope the air in the room will be a buzz with people saying, "What? God is for sex? What, he created it?"

The trouble is that non-believers out there don't see what they think we see. They see lots and lots of people claiming to be God followers doing whatever they want with whoever they want. Local radio hosts in Austin recently discussed the best places to pick up women. The best place... church and not for reasons you would assume. The problem is that the lines between a non-believer's view on sex and the believer's view on sex are relatively the same. The buzz in the room is, "If that's true then why did the guy that invited me here just trample all over that boundary last night?" In the spirit of looking at the beam in my eye I want to convey that I am not being judgemental and critical but instead attempting to help us in youth work. We get to attack this head on but the work is so much harder than making an awesome lesson. Let me explain.

I want to say that if you don't have authentic, deep, and Biblical community at the core of your group then you're not going to realistically be able to talk about anything. Kids need leaders to not teach them the lesson but actually living the lesson with everything they have and everything they've got. The beauty of community is that it is secure, real, honest, and loving. The truth can be heard and presented with accountability. This means you will have to be in your leader's lives and start with them first. They are the ones that can influence and strengthen the boundaries of truth throughout the community. Help them wrestle out of their temptations, give them community, love them enough to lead them well, and then be honest yourself with your own struggles. If it's easy for your leaders to live duplicity with church and the world it will be even that much more easier for students to do the same.

The mental and spiritual channel switching that people can do today with the drop of a hat is too much for us to think we can overcome with a mass talk to a general audience we will never see throughout the week. Just some random thoughts. Thanks for reading.